On Being Wrong

I’ve been wrong. Lots of times. Still. Forever. I’ll always be encountering things that inspire reassessment.

Oh how uncomfortable it feels to realise you are wrong. And I would suggest that the mainstream culture of parenting and schooling has contributed a lot to that reaction.

But really, the most incredible things in my life came from reassessment. They were the product of recognising “wrong”.

Sometimes it can feel preferable to live wrong in order to maintain an appearance of being right. Sometimes it can feel preferable to live wrong in order to make the time you’ve already spent worthwhile.

But what do you actually gain by continuing to invest in wrong? Do you want to appear right about the wrong thing? Does spending more time on wrong make it any less wrong?

I’ve stayed in relationships and situations and under ideals and inside arguments far too long after I felt that niggle, after I was confronted with something that called into question my take on reality. Worried that to change now made all that came before it a waste, worried about how it would reflect on me to change my mind, worried about appearing weak or silly or stupid, worried about disappointing people. Wanting to not be wrong.

And yet I’ve never regretted changing or apologising or leaving, I’ve only regretted waiting so long to.

Ignoring wrong, can’t make something right. The information exists whether you acknowledge it or not. If you’re resisting because it is too late or too far or too hard… then on some level you know you’re not investing because it is right.

Being wrong is easier. But is it worthwhile? Where do you actually want to invest your time and energy?

It is overwhelming to consider changing.

And I think part of it is letting it be overwhelming. Instead of resisting all those emotions, lean in to how difficult it is. When something is a transition, it is going to be hard, it is kind of meant to be I think. It wouldn’t really work if it wasn’t, you know? Like working out, you have to feel it for it to be making those changes.

Hitting the snooze button when confronted, it is an immediate relief but at what cost?

If you sleep through your transitions, they don’t happen, they can’t happen and you might not get another chance.

Your time is finite. In regards to parenting; your time with your children is finite.

And what could be waiting for you on the other side of wrong? On the other side of discomfort?

What if being wrong isn’t a disaster? What if it was an opportunity?

What if it is exactly what you were meant to encounter to get to where you were meant to be?

 

You may also like

2 Comments

  1. Just love this, Jessica.

    Seeing being wrong as an opportunity, and a way to get where we were meant to be. Fab!

    It can be so hard to admit when we are wrong but can be so powerful for connecting with others. How lovely for our children to see that we can admit to our mistakes, change course and be kind to ourselves in the process, powerful stuff indeed.

    Thanks for the reminder that being wrong, doesn’t have to just be, well, wrong!?

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *